April 15, 2010

2 questions about Larry King's 8th divorce.

1. When you're that old — he's 76 — and you have a mate who's more than a quarter of a century younger than you, shouldn't you look at the odds and hang onto her as someone who'll be on the hook to care for you as you decline into extreme old age and death — considering how difficult it will be to enlist someone new when that is the deal?

2. Larry King is only 76?!

42 comments:

Fred4Pres said...

I guess it is good to be King...

John said...

My mother used to say that Larry King looks like someone you would see peaking into your window at night. He really does have that "creepy old man" look down.

Skyler said...

That miserable man can't even convince any of eight different women, with all the money and prestige that he has, to stick with him. Either he's a jerk, or an idiot.

So why does anyone watch his show?

For the same reason they have some sordid fascination for reading Andrew Sullivan, I guess.

Hoosier Daddy said...

Either he's a jerk, or an idiot.

C.) All of the above.

IMO, you can always rule the first failed marriage as a mulligan. After the second failure then you need to start admitting that the problem lies within either with your personality or your choice in mates. Either way the responsbility is yours.

SteveR said...

Its a hard 76

ricpic said...

Meshuggah for shiksas.

Brian Day said...

He is 76. She is 50. That doesn't sound too bad until you realize that they were married in 1997. Back then he was 63 and she was 37.
That ups the creepiness factor a lot.

Wince said...

He really does have that "creepy old man" look down.

This picture expecially reminded me of Montgomery Burns.

...shouldn't you look at the odds and hang onto her as someone who'll be on the hook to care for you as you decline into extreme old age and death — considering how difficult it will be to enlist someone new when that is the deal?.

"Excellent, Smithers."

Balfegor said...

When you're that old — he's 76 — and you have a mate who's more than a quarter of a century younger than you, shouldn't you look at the odds and hang onto her as someone who'll be on the hook to care for you as you decline into extreme old age and death — considering how difficult it will be to enlist someone new when that is the deal?

How hard is it really? He's rich, isn't he? You can pay people to do that kind of thing -- there's a whole industry in nurses and caretakers and so on. If all he wants is someone to care for him as he declines into old age and death, he can just hire a servant.

ricpic said...

In the greater fool race to the finish it's turkey neck and turkey neck between Larry King and Liz Taylor.

Scott said...

My Dad is ten years older than King. He's dating another resident of the assisted living home he's in. Her senility isn't quite as advanced as his is, but it's getting there.

I know it shouldn't, but the idea of really, really old people having intimate relationships sort of creeps me out.

Anonymous said...

I have it on good authority that he divorced her because she decided to shave. Good for him!

Peter

joated said...

Hey! Leave Larry King alone. He's trying to field a women's softball team here, guys. He's currently one shy. (Two if they still play that short fielder or the DH rule.)

Trooper York said...

"shouldn't you look at the odds and hang onto her as someone who'll be on the hook to care for you as you decline into extreme old age and death — considering how difficult it will be to enlist someone new when that is the deal?"

Oh. So that explains it. Hee.

jeff said...

The man turned into a muppet years ago. And who can forget the "OJ, if you're listening, It's Larry"
Oh, and the year when he did the Olympics and his show, and then sleepwalked thru it. That was comedy gold.

former law student said...

considering how difficult it will be to enlist someone new when that is the deal?


Anna Nicole Smith married J. Howard Marshall when she was 26 and he was 89 -- assuming King has some bucks, marrying young should get easier as he gets older -- less time till he goes to his eternal reward and she receives an earthly one.

That doesn't sound too bad until you realize that they were married in 1997. Back then he was 63 and she was 37.


Vicki Kennedy married that fat tub of goo when she was 38 and he was 60, back in 1992. So pretty much the same thing, although King was never a fat boozer who left a young woman to die in a pond.

MadisonMan said...

Trooper, that was mean. Funny, but mean.

Anonymous said...

Larry may be a "creepy old man" or a jerk or an idiot or all three. If that is the case, his continued ability to woo and marry says more about the women than Larry. Why does Ann attack the creepy old man and give the women who marry creepy old men a pass?

Trooper York said...

"Funny, but mean."

That's my technique in a nutshell.

Trooper York said...

I come from the Don Rickles, Sam Kinnison, Rodney Dangerfield school of comedy.

Unknown said...

For somebody that old, male, and single, The Blonde has a saying, "Nurse or purse". He has one and can afford the other (at least until ZeroCare throws him in front of a death panel), but he might be pushing his luck living alone between spouses.

Scott said...

My Dad is ten years older than King. He's dating another resident of the assisted living home he's in. Her senility isn't quite as advanced as his is, but it's getting there.

I know it shouldn't, but the idea of really, really old people having intimate relationships sort of creeps me out.


It's your parents' way of getting even.

The Drill SGT said...

Maybe she was dating Tiger?

On a more serious note, he still needs a few more recruits for the baseball team... Of the 8 marriages, one was to the same woman twice.

The Drill SGT said...

Scott said...
I know it shouldn't, but the idea of really, really old people having intimate relationships sort of creeps me out.


All things are relative, Scott...

So let's see. Your dad is 86.

Let's call you 56.

How do you think your 26 y/o kids think about the old man having intimate relations? Likely it creeps them out as well :)

having fun yet?

PS, I'm older than your notional age, so don't take it personally.

Unknown said...

Conspiracy theory warning:

Larry's had major heart disease for years. I think Mrs. King thought she'd be rid of him and have the dough years ago. Methinks she enlisted her sister in this scheme in exchange for a piece of the settlement.

orbicularioculi said...

I've never been a Larry King fan. However, I think he's a rather unique person. Not perfect, quite imperfect but unique, and he's led an interesting life.

He seems to have maintained good relationships with his former spouses.

The idea that he may be "gettin' it on" with attractive women 25 years younger may have creeped me out when I was 24, but I just smile today.

If only we could all be enjoying our lives as much as he seems to at the age of 76.

Phil 314 said...

When the suspenders drop
the nuptials stop

KCFleming said...

He's 76, in dog-years.

Scott said...

@The Drill Sgt.: You have a point. Even if was off the top of your head. :)

Drew W said...

Wow, and here I was thinking that Larry King had been married to Deanna (“Land Of The Giants”) Lund. Apparently they dated, got engaged, but never got married. I guess she was the one that got away. (Not as sexy as Lee Meriwether in “The Time Tunnel,” but still . . .)

Oh, this was supposed to be a post about Larry King’s divorce. Whatever.

save_the_rustbelt said...

I think the years of booze and gambling and the occasion stint in jail have aged Larry and his bad heart beyond his years.

At that age I would forget the trade and keep the current model.

save_the_rustbelt said...

The progression of marital sex.


1) tri-weekly

2) try weekly

3) try weakly

Trooper York said...

Unless you are Big Ben Rostenberger and you have your cop friends keep everyone out of the VIP area so you can molest some drunk college girl. Allegedly.

Trooper York said...

I think the Rooney's are going to trade his sorry as. Maybe to the Jets. Holy restraining order Batman.

KCFleming said...

76 is the new 70.

Peg C. said...

I'd say he looks 176! Actually he looks like he's been dead and buried for several years.

Charlie Martin said...

If you're rich enough to have an eighth (trophy) wife, you're rich enough to hire nurses.

kmg said...

Why are the women getting a free pass (as usual)?

They are all gold-diggers, and exploit the divorce laws that heavily favor women in order to extract money from men.

'No fault' divorce is exactly what women like, since women like to avoid responsibility.

I have to admire Larry King for getting such a young hottie, though.

At this point, his value in the sexual market is higher than hers, even if he is 76 and she is 47.

Anonymous said...

The Korean girl who has to give Mariah Carey a Brazilian when she is having her period.

Christ Almighty, don't get me started.

Peter

Carol_Herman said...

Let's see, wife says she caught him in bed with her sister. Or something about her sister getting a piece of Larry, alive. Whatever.

He exits house and goes to attorney. Attorney is the faster of two. Since his wife also goes out and gets a "serving attorney."

Should be a simple divorce. Two people want one. And, Larry? He gets more free publicity. His name is seen by more people than who come by these days to see his show.

Carol_Herman said...

And, Martha Stewart, who needed to be seen on Larry's Show, long ago, so she could go "national," said, he was always trying to "feel her up." Larry's always squeezing the merchandise.

And, if his wife's now 50? She's menopausal. He's doing what lots of men do, WHEN THEY HAVE DA' MONEY!

That she's the mom of two of his kids? Well, he wants joint custody.

So, the process? I guess it will come down to da' money. Which CNN gives to Larry King. (Sort'a like Tiger. The earnings are sky high.)

Tiger ahead? Maybe, a reduction in the mega-bucks? No happiness in da' marriage.

Larry? Who even knows what prompts these people to take vows?

The Crack Emcee said...

Larry King is a perfect example of how "marriage" means nothing now. (I still can't read Ann's references to Meade as her "husband" without being reminded he was someone else's spouse - for life - not too long ago, and wondering, after their years together, how his actual "wife" feels about his sudden fame as someone else's pick-up companion.) If you ask me, like Larry King, people involved in this nonsense are really only "dating" professionally.

Nothing wrong with that, except when asking the rest of us to go along with the lie/charade:

Child: What's marriage?

Parent: It's a promise you make until it's inconvenient.

Meade said...

Child: What's marriage?

Parent: It's a promise you make until it's inconvenient.


Child: Would it be inconvenient to stay married to a murderer?

Parent: No. That would be unconscionable.