May 2, 2012

Bristol Palin's ex-paramour Levi Johnston is having a second child, by a girlfriend named Sunny, and he's naming the baby girl after a gun.

A gun and a light wind. The little girl will go forth into life with the name Breeze Beretta, and good luck to the girl who might blow us all away — gently.

The mother's name is Sunny. Sunny Oglesby. So Sunny and Breeze. It makes sense. The "Breeze" is for Sunny, and the gun, one imagines, is for Levi, who, it seems, can't keep his gun in his Levis.
[Oglesby] talked about the accidental nature of the pregnancy.

"We were out at the cabin for like, four days, and forgot the birth control," she said.
A cabin! Man, Bristol got impregnated in a tent. Sunny got a cabin. It's so unfair!
Johnston told Inside Edition that he plans on doing things differently with Oglesby than he did with Bristol Palin, the mother of their son, Tripp.
Well, he's starting out right. Cabin instead of tent.
"I'm actually in love...not doing it just because we had a kid together," he said.
Enough of this doing-something-for-the-child business. Moving on to love. Actual love.

50 comments:

ndspinelli said...

I'm hearing the dueling banjos from Deliverance playing in my head.

YoungHegelian said...

As I become an even older old white fart, I begin to have more & more sympathy with the French government's prohibition on inflicting weird-ass names on innocent babies.

prairie wind said...

What you wrote is certainly entertaining but I hate the idea of burdening this couple with attention like this. Attention like...the kind where we all make fun of them.

Don't be so mean.

Dust Bunny Queen said...

And we should give a sh*t about this....because???

Fritz said...

Her taste in men has nowhere to go but up.

Anonymous said...

Because Levi is a virile bull moose!

Wince said...

...and the gun, one imagines, is for Levi, who, it seems, can't keep his gun in his Levis.

"This is for fighting, this is for fun."

Chip Ahoy said...

Alaska sounds like a lot of fun.

Andy said...

Levi Johnston will always remain a national treasure for his Playgirl photos.

David said...

Shouldn't we just call him "Johnson" and drop the rest. It's so descriptive.

I'm Full of Soup said...

Charles Murray would group Levi in the value-challenged Fishtown demographic.

ndspinelli said...

As a sidebar, I thought I was the only person left who still used the term "paramour." When I used it in my reports to clients some would tell me that was a "judgemental" word. I kept using it because they were being judgemental, not I. PC is pernicious crap.

MadisonMan said...

Like she won't be called BB for the rest of her life.

edutcher said...

Baretta, huh?

I guess it's fitting; his weapon is forever going off.

Andy R. said...

Levi Johnston will always remain a national treasure for his Playgirl photos.

No wanking online.

ndspinelli said...

AndyR, How could you choke your chicken looking @ a redneck, gun toting, tobacco chewing, hillbilly. Don't you hate yourself in the morning?

Saint Croix said...

Millions of girls are forced to make this horrible choice every day. And the liberal response, of course, is...

you're so stupid.

So much better to have an abortion, repress the whole thing, and pretend it never happened.

This sort of unintended pregnancy doesn't happen to celebrities and other successful people. Have you noticed? Those babies disappear.

What's so infuriating about the Palins--and people like them--is how low class they are. And by low class we mean people who are honest and open and say what they think and feel. We're embarrassed by these hillbillies with their unwanted babies.

Althouse mocks people for being unable to "keep it in their pants." Yes, you're unable to control yourself, you silly, silly boy.

How many times do we reference sex on this blog? How many times do we talk about it, think about it, joke about it?

All the fucking time.

And now we're going to point fingers and mock somebody for an unintended pregnancy?

The hypocrisy of liberals is appalling and quite stupid. And dishonest.

Jdennyv said...

T he gun REF: I am sure is a ref: to the the Beratta

RonF said...

These days sex doesn't have to lead to babies. If you participate in the start of a pregnancy and didn't mean to, you're not too bright. Especially if you don't have the means to support the resultant child. That's low class.

Geoff Matthews said...

Love isn't a feeling, love is an action.
I give it two years.

prairie wind said...

Saint Croix: +1

Bart Hall (Kansas, USA) said...

Girls play at sex -- for which they're not ready -- to get what they actually want, which is love.

Boys play at love -- for which they are not ready -- to get what they actually want, ...

That's why it's the girl who always gets burnt.

I Callahan said...

and the gun, one imagines, is for Levi, who, it seems, can't keep his gun in his Levis

Call me old fashioned, but Sunny had to have said yes, didn't she? I'm tired of the old saw that the boy "got the girl in trouble".

This is what feminism has wrought. Girls are just pieces of meat, because they act like pieces of meat.

You've come a long way, baby.

I'm Full of Soup said...

Saint Croix:

I am no liberal and am criticizing Levi for his serial out-of wedlock births which tend to lead to a more difficult life.

White trash, black trash - call it whatever you want but it is hurting the country and especially the kids who grow up in these households. Many many of them are essentially doomed to a shitty life.

Levi appears to think he do like a mega-rich Hollywood actor or an NBA star.

Saint Croix said...

I think on a subconscious, animal level, we want to have babies. We want to reproduce. To me this isn't stupidity so much as people following their subconscious desires. She wants a family with Levi. She wants to have a baby with him. "I forgot my birth control."

Oh, did you?

And he wants to have a baby with her. This subconscious desire is often repressed and denied. And for many of us, when the pregnancy happens, the repression and the denial take the physical form of making the pregnancy disappear.

Liberals believe in plans and control. Parenthood should be planned. Sex should be planned. Populations should be controlled. Everything should be regulated.

But human beings have feelings. And a primal desire to mate and have children. This is what gives sex its power.

Birth control is technology. This idea that people can't work the condom or swallow the pill, bah. We want this to happen. We recognize it can happen and we dare ourselves to allow it to happen.

I really think we should question the concept of "accident" when it comes to sex.

Jane the Actuary said...

"Forgot the condoms" = didn't really care if she got pregnant or not. Like my nephew's 17-year-old girlfriend and mother of twins, who's saving the babies' outgrown clothes for her sister, since she's 16 after all, and ready to be a mom herself.

I Callahan said...

I am no liberal and am criticizing Levi for his serial out-of wedlock births which tend to lead to a more difficult life.

Last I looked, it takes two to tango. Neither party mentioned rape, so why should Levi take all of the blame?

Feminism told women to go out and screw. They did that, got pregnant without being ready (mentally or financially), and the man gets the blame.

I'll repeat the point: She had to have said yes first. Start at the source.

prairie wind said...

I miss the time when a couple got pregnant and people were happy about the baby instead of crabbing about who was to blame.

I Callahan said...

I miss the time when a couple got pregnant and people were happy about the baby instead of crabbing about who was to blame.

That horse left the barn a long time ago.

Harold said...

I have friends who named their sons Smith and Wesson and a woman I used to work with who agreed to name her son Shadow Wolf and her daughter Autumn Willow after her boyfriend's two favorite Magic the Gathering cards.

Breeze Berreta doesn't seem to out there in comparison.

traditionalguy said...

So far both babies are going to live and have parents who will work in Alaska's energy based economy and may have a good life. That sounds so old fashioned.

At least they were not conceived in the back seat of a Chevrolet. So times are getting better.

Eric the Fruit Bat said...

A better middle name would have been "Robert Blake."

Saint Croix said...

White trash, black trash - call it whatever you want but it is hurting the country

Are you still talking about babies? Babies are hurting the country? Sex is hurting the country? Fornication? What is the "it" that is hurting the country? Lack of abortion is hurting the country? Do we need to air drop birth control into the Alaska wilderness? Perhaps we should mandate birth control and save the country from the horrible scourge of whatever it is that is hurting the country.

Many many of them are essentially doomed to a shitty life.

Humanity? Humanity is doomed? Or babies are doomed? Is it the poor that are doomed? White trash is doomed? Or are black people doomed? You want to save black people from the evils of reproduction?

Could you give us some more detail on the shitty life this white trash baby might expect? And what are your plans to save her from her shitty white trash life? Or are we just mocking her shitty white trash existence? And since you managed to work both race and shit into your diatribe, might I ask how your toilet training has affected your politics?

Darcy said...

I believe a baby is a life intentionally created by God. A blessing. And Sunny, and certainly Bristol too, are champs for choosing life. I don't care where that life was conceived.

Darcy said...

And "white trash" means you think you are better than they are. No, you're not.

Fen said...

Is HuffPo going to cover all the girlfriends of Bristol's ex-boyfriends?

Obama must really suck.

HuffPo: "Today, Bristol Palin's thrid boyfriend's second cousin's ex-girlfriend said..."

Methadras said...

Levi Johnston, the K-Fed of our times.

JackOfClubs said...

Why are we still talking about this loser? His 15 minutes were up hours ago.

jimbino said...

Hey, if you have a kid out of wedlock, you get lots of financial support from the gummint. People respond to incentives, and the gummint is incentivizing breeding out of wedlock.

That's a message a single mother needs to pass on to her kids!

Toad Trend said...

"Johnston told Inside Edition that he plans on doing things differently with Oglesby than he did with Bristol Palin, the mother of their son, Tripp.

Well, he's starting out right. Cabin instead of tent."

Great stuff, besides, Levi is showing growth here. Look on the bright side. Next time will be a truck stop shower, or better yet, Motel Six.

I'm Full of Soup said...

My point was a broad one.

Make a commitment, get married , give your kids a far greater chance to grow up in a two-parent family as opposed to a single parent households with a bunch of half-brothers and half-sisters coming and going.

1775OGG said...

Maybe we all should just take a break, after all, Levi's just a young kid, barely into his 20's, perhaps. Poor guy has got enough to worry about than just taking care of his growing family, so to speak!

Jeez, isn't this just a bridge too far, metaphorically speaking?

BarrySanders20 said...

Well, I dig you Georgia peaches
Makes me feel right at home
Well now, I dig you Georgia peaches
Makes me feel right at home
But I don't love me no one woman
So I can't stay in Georgia long

Well now, they call me the breeze
I keep blowin' down the road
Well now, they call me the breeze
I keep blowin' down the road
I ain't got me nobody
I don't carry me no load

Ralph L said...

Bristol lost her virginity in a tent, but she didn't get knocked up until later.

I will allow some artistic license, since it is your blog.

Wonder if Levi still woos with wine coolers?

The Crack Emcee said...

Darcy,

I believe a baby is a life intentionally created by God.

I was following this thread pretty darned well, and then I got there and started cracking up!

Oh Darcy, PLEASE put a warning label on these pronouncements, in case I'm drinking coffee or something,...

Oh - and Saint Croix: +2

Ignorance is Bliss said...

We were out at the cabin for like, four days, and forgot the birth control...

...and, apparently, the self control.

While most young people know pregnancy is a possibility, they don't think it will actually happen to them. Levi, and anyone dating him, do not have that excuse.

wyo sis said...

A certain pleasurable physical act sometimes results in a baby. This is not news. Even rednecks know it. What is sometimes not accepted is that after that baby is created it has life and its parents are responsible for it.
Civilizations that take the responsibility of caring for children away from parents, devalue life and encourage sexual immorality end up with a bunch of problems that governments can't solve. Only decency can solve it and decency is in short supply in such a society.

rcommal said...

Who knows--what? Maybe this one will be raised father-in-tow.

Bottom line: There's a new kid in the world, and a raising there will be. Full stop. I don't see how kvetching over the incidental famous among an infinitesimal number of parents is particularly helpful in facing, much less doing, the reality of bringing up kids to take charge of their own lives.

Clyde said...

Maybe the next baby-mama can get impregnated in a double-wide.

Saint Croix said...

Oh Darcy, PLEASE put a warning label on these pronouncements, in case I'm drinking coffee or something,...

Oh - and Saint Croix: +2


I appreciate the points but you know I agree with Darcy. I also would suggest that reducing humanity to just another animal is dangerous. And it's also dangerous to reduce humanity to a biological creation. "That's my sperm and her egg and we created it so we can do whatever we want to it." No. We have sex and sex creates babies, but it's not like we are authors with absolute power over our creation. I've made this point before, it's dangerous to play god. And if religious people make the mistake of thinking they speak for God, atheists can make the mistake of playing god. It's a similar arrogance.

I am, of course, familiar with both arrogance and self-righteousness. And being glib about sex.

Nice to have you back, Crack.

Tee2green said...

Darcy said, "And "white trash" means you think you are better than they are. No, you're not."

Just for the record, I'm not the one who called them "white trash", but by any objective standard, I am better than they are.