May 11, 2013

Concerned... and vindictive...

... in Montana:
A concerned Lakeside Boulevard resident reported two men and three women, all drunk, were shooting a potato gun in the park to the south, and wanted to know if the activity was legal....

A concerned passerby reported a vehicle parked in the middle of 13th Street West with a rifle leaning against the passenger seat. The passerby just wanted the motorist advised that he can’t park in the middle of the street.

A vindictive 12th Avenue West resident contacted the Columbia Falls Police Department to report that her neighbor complained about her on Monday, and now she wanted to complain about the neighbor.
ALSO: "After receiving a 911 hang-up call, [Whitefish Police Department] called the man back to check on his well-being. He said everything was OK and that he was testing his phone and that he thought he hung up before it went through. He then said he was a 'sovereign United States citizen' who pays taxes, and that the person who called him back was invading his space."

24 comments:

chickelit said...

I have a potato cannon--they're easy to construct and the use hairspray as a combustable propellent. I'd load it up with glowsticks at night and do colorful "showers" for the kids. But this all came to end after we adopted a rescue dog last year. She is absolutely terrified of booms and firecrackers. She shakes uncontrollably--so I stopped.

Sorun said...

"A pair of frantic teenage boys...desperately trying to stomp out a fire that was running along the ground and growing."

Brings back memories. Part of boyhood is experimenting with fire. It's only surprising that more fires don't get out of control.

Bruce Hayden said...

In Phoenix right now, and getting ready to move back to Montana in the next couple of weeks. Can't wait. Population in town there is 0.1% of that of the Phoenix metro area. Don't get honked at, cars stop to let you cross the road, people know you, etc. Much less rushing around. I would live there year around, but SWMBO (she who must be obeyed) is a wimp when it comes to cold, and likes to sleep with the windows open.

Phx here was in the national news with that murder trial this week. Pretty bad drug problems. Illegals have taken over most of the trades, and you run into situations a bit where no one working in a fast food place speaks English as a first language. And police response is abysmal - had a license plate stolen in January, and it took a cop an hour to respond on a "priority dispatch".

Don't know how much of this is the difference between Phoenix and a small town in NW Montana, but I can't wait to get back. There are places in Montana that I am not sure I would like as much (probably too much money up there in Flathead County for me, Great Falls and Butte are not great, eastern part of the state is pretty flat, etc.) Still, really prefer small town life to pretty much any big city I have lived in.

campy said...

Police? Feh. 12th Ave. gal shoulda sicced the IRS on the bitch.

JAL said...

I started a fire with my girlfriend. I was absolutely sure I could stomp it out with my brown leather shoes, but was afraid to.

We ran home. My mother called the local volunteer fire department and went out with a broom and beat it out by the time they got there.

The girlfriend's mother cornered us in a hallway at her house. "Did you start that fire? You did. I CAN. SEE. IT. IN. YOUR. EYES."

I will never forget that and sure enough, when I was became a mom I could see. it. in. their. eyes!

One of my boys actually experimented with little pipe bombs. (before 9/11) Aaauuuggh!

A fatherly chat based on a friend detective's input fixed that.

Now he shoots bad guys.

JAL said...

@ Bruce Still, really prefer small town life to pretty much any big city I have lived in.

Obviously a morally inferior choice to make.

JAL said...

Look up Whitefish and "ski joring"

Lots of fun activities in Montana even in the winter.

dc said...

Bruce Hayden

Great Falls not great?
Screw you.
I'm going to ride my horse now squish.

James said...

He then said he was a 'sovereign United States citizen' who pays taxes, and that the person who called him back was invading his space."

Did anyone check to see if this caller was related to Reese Witherspoon?

Reese Witherspoon Dash Cam video

Reese: "I have done nothing against the law."

Officer: "Yes you did, you didn't obey my orders."

Reese: "I HAVE TO OBEY YOUR ORDERS??"

Reese: "I'm now being arrested and handcuffed??"

Reese: "I'm an American citizen ... I'm allowed to stand on American ground."
Reese: "You better not arrest me."


Reese: "I'm being anti-American?"

Officer: "Yes, please sit down."

Reese: "Wow!"

Reese: "You're harassing me as an American citizen"

And the best line -- "I'm obstructing your justice?"

Aridog said...

@Bruce Hayden ... my favorite spot of Montana is the Paradise Valley near Pray and Emigrant. With luck I'll be there in June for a couple weeks in a cabin I rent on the Yellowstone River. I have friends that live there and I'm mostly jealous.

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

Policeman: You know why I pulled you over?

Pig: Beacause I'm a pig, driving a convertible?

Policeman: (after a pregnant pause) Tail lights... fix it.

Its one of their best ever.

madAsHell said...

I'm thinking there's a lot of mental illness documented in that police blotter. Many appear to be self-medicated as well.

I could never be a police officer with a firearm on my hip. When a hammer is your only tool, then everything starts to look like a nail. If ya' know what I mean....

Unknown said...

Writers of small town police dockets are either master ironists or completely sincere hacks.

Gahrie said...

Brings back memories. Part of boyhood is experimenting with fire. It's only surprising that more fires don't get out of control.

and playing with knives and running around in the woods.....which is why the Scouts used to be so valuable. It allowed you to indulge your facinations in a safe and controlled environment.

RazorSharpSundries said...

Man they sure do love their potato guns in Montana. I know I a guy from Wolf Point who would regale me with tales of potato gun mayhem in his wayward youth. In North Dakota all we had were bottle rockets and TJ Swan. It's sad to see that nowadays potato gun usage is being questioned by obviously transplanted pinkos from Colorado.

Phil 314 said...

no one working in a fast food place speaks English as a first language.

A good sign that the Carne asado taco plate will be good.

Phil 314 said...

Asada

Sydney said...

Small town living does seem to attract quirky people.

Tim said...

Bruce- go to Red Lodge- 45 minutes to Billings (Costco) and and hour or so to the NE entrance of Yellowsone over the Beartooth Highway.

madAsHell said...

in a safe and controlled environment.

Sarcasm??

I'll never forget the time that Ray threw the hatchet at Carlton, the Scoutmaster's son. He was an annoying little shit, and nobody said a word.

galdosiana said...

Ha, this one made me laugh:

"An Eighth Avenue East North resident called with questions about city ordinances, explaining that he was in the untenable situation of owning chickens and living next door to a person who owns a bird dog."

The Cracker Emcee Refulgent said...

I made a Home Depot potato cannon as well. Amazingly fun, cheap, and harmless with the application of minimal common sense. I don't shoot it off the deck anymore because I don't want to alarm my high-strung, though otherwise wonderful, neighbor.

Rusty said...

Aridog said...
@Bruce Hayden ... my favorite spot of Montana is the Paradise Valley near Pray and Emigrant. With luck I'll be there in June for a couple weeks in a cabin I rent on the Yellowstone River. I have friends that live there and I'm mostly jealous.

My favorite place in Montana is a trout stream any one of them is fine.

Rusty said...

The next time you're in Butte take the bus tour. It's a hoot.
Also there is a mining museum and a mineral museum at the local university.